IN BULK.  With a pretzel & a pink emonade

Keywords: jeans, shopping, mens jeans

I did that whole summer/winter clean-out thing where you wake up one morning and you realize it’s almost time to wear jeans on the regular…. and then it sets in:  aaaaaah crap, I don’t like my jeans from last season.   So,  after a large personal battle, I wrestle myself into my car, sit in 55 minutes of Long Island traffic to go 9 miles, browse the parking lot for a spot that won’t leave me with scratches and keymarks down the side of my chariot of fire.  Walk into the mall…. I HAVE to stop at the puppy place, are you kidding me?  Have you ever seen a 4 week old Bulldog puppy?  If not, then you haven’t lived.


Here I am… At the mall…  I usually do a loser lap-  just to see what new stores opened up, see what products are on display, see what types of wonderful Fashion beauts I spy walking around.  Make like 18 trips past the chinese food place in the food court “OFCOURSE I WANT SESAME CHICKEN ON A TOOTHPICK! NO, I”VE NEVER TASTED IT! THAT SOUNDS DELICIOUS”.   Now that I had lunch, it’s time for dessert-  Over to ol’ faithful:  Auntie Annes pretzels and pink lemonade(you’ll note the fresh pretzel and pink deliciousness sitting on the counter beside my 237 pairs of jeans).  Now i’m all set, let’s go jean shopping.You walk into the store and either get bombarded by help,  or feel like you have to find some secret button to press that alerts the staff that you’re even alive.   In and out of store after store, nothing fits, nothing looks good, nothing works.      Then, on your last ditch effort, you walk into the last store of the day,  they have a whole section of jeans screaming your name.   “let me try one pair on, and if they fit, then i’ll pick a couple and call it a day” … nope.  I go in that dressing room, jeans fit like a glove, look awesome with my new sneaks, affordable… SOLD.   That’s when I fall into trouble.    I just found a pair of jeans that fit awesome, look great, and are affordable!?   I’ll never find this again.

So maybe 237 pairs of jeans in a single shopping trip is a huge exaggeration, but I am definitely good for 10-12 at a time. And ironically, jeans are my least favorite thing to wear.    Moral of the story:  It’s okay to be an obsessive shopper when you find something that works.  Try telling that to your credit card company :)